this is my boyfriend [dazel ray morrow<3]
i had an AMAZING week, thanks to him! i had
the week off from work, and got to just relax, although
i will admit, lazy life is NOT for me :p. jk bbby!

um, i had to work 4-9 today. then justin and i went
to walmart, mcdonalds, and blockbuster.

steven [the ex] texted me and was all like
"..can't we just put this all behind us.." and
blah blah blah, and i told him i did, along time
ago and that i didn't have anything left to say
to him, i'm so proud of me :) yay!

i'm going to Dazel's all next week. :) i'm excitedddd! fun shittt<3
i just need to be near my grandma, incase something happens,
so i thought going there would be better for me right now than
going away to camp. please keep praying for her, it's helping!

my grandma is still sick :/, she had another tia [mini-stroke] today.
that's not the first [or second] one this week :( this isn't good.
please please please pray for her guys, please!

I broke up with Matthew,  think we're much better as friends. I see him as more of my little brother, and I like it that way. He understood. :)


well I was up until freaking 8:30 this morning, it was so worth it. I stayed with my cousin Jesse, and we actually stayed at Steph's house. and Dazel and Cody, and Megan stayed too. it was really fun! shit like that doesn't happen in Hickory; lameass!

but anyways, we stayed up. Jesse, Steph, and Meg were wrestling, until Steph started getting serious and Stephen made them stop :p. Then they got the bright idea to do make overs, i HATE make up. but ya know, it's whatever, we did it. then Steph and Stephen went to bed, and we all stayed up. at like 6am the boys and Megan went to the store and Jesse fell asleep, I dozed off until they came back making all kinds of noise :p. D<3 really likes me, and has for awhile, and now that I'm beginning  to get to know him, I'm starting to like him as well :). Well around 8:30 everyone starting going to sleep, so we all picked our beds, and I ended up [stupidly] picking this small chair, lol. well then I got a migrane, so D<3 rubbed my back until i fell asleep, and made sure the others left me alone. he's really sweet, and completely not what i expected him to be like, in a goooood way<3. well i guess we'll see where it goes :). oh then he sent me a text; cause i mean i wasn't in the chair right beside him ;) lol, and he was like "you better wake me up before you leave, i have to have my hug, or you can't go" :p

okay that's about it. for that night :p that you should be knowing about, ;], jk!

um, tonight [saturday] I had to work 4:45-10. the family was having a birthday party for my [soon to be] nephew, who is 12 now, wow I'm old! and I caught part of it, lolz. they're all still down at the pond, but I'm totally wiped out. i wish D<3 would call. :D 

although, you're not who you'd think you are.
i'm a horrible person, and an even worse girlfriend.
i still don't know what to do.

well let's see, today i went to get my paycheck, and get it cashed. and my new phone came today, so i went to mom's work to pick it up. then i went to my sister's, and all that good junk. um, then i came home, and dad came and got me, and we went to get my jeep cause it decided to be gay again today. and i spent time with him, and we went to dinner. Logan called during dinner and wants me to hang out with him and Justin H. and some people, but i don't really feel like it, i wanna see Matthew<3. I'm going to work for Britney tomorrow from 5-9, so yeah. then i work 4:30-close Wednesday, and i don't know what times Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. um i go to camp on august 4th, we're leaving at nine am, and we come back august 9th. but thats all for now, i'm going to do..i don't know what hahah!

okay, so for anyone concerned :), i have COMPLETELY stopped talking to steven. I deleted him from my myspace, and aim. and my mom is bringing me a box tomorrow to put all his clothes in; and all the notes and little shit he gave me, so she can take it back to him. i'm finally over it. and Matthew understands where i'm coming from..and he is willing to take it really slow, and help me ya know? so i'm not giving up on him.

but other than that? nothing exciting really, i work again from 4:30-9 tonight, come visit :D. and i get paid tomorrow, plus my new phone should be here tomorrow or tuesday!

i've talked to my mom, and i've talked to cortney,
and i think i've came to a conclusion; i won't
jump the gun though, i'll tell you about it later.


this kid makes me laugh!

1:17am
aldude717: whats up?
x7: movie, you?
aldude717: music
aldude717: being single
 x7: lol, i'm sorry
aldude717: its cool
aldude717: you?
x7: its kinda complicated lolz
aldude717: ok?
x7: what school do you go to?
aldude717: st. stephens high
aldude717: you?
 x7: hickory
aldude717: grade?
x7: grade?
x7: oh lol senior
aldude717: i'm a junior
aldude717: am i cute?
x7: mhm
aldude717: hot?
x7: mhm
x7: why?
aldude717: just wondering how my looks are lol
aldude717: sexy?
x7: lol, sure.
x7: :p
aldude717: want to strip you and throw you down hot?
aldude717: lol
x7: lol, you're funny, youknow that?
aldude717: really?
x7: yeah
aldude717: how?
x7: just funny :]
aldude717: and hot
x7: lol
aldude717: wow that is super awesome
x7: :-)
aldude717: anything you want to talk about?
x7: idk, anythign you want to talk about?
aldude717: well i'm a teenage boy lol
aldude717: don't know if you want to go there
x7: haha, atleast you're honest.
aldude717: yea
x7: okay, anything appropriate you'd like to talk about? lolz
aldude717: that is appropriate
aldude717: but mmmm idk
x7: lol
aldude717: what music do you like?
x7: um, i like "wimpy"rock, and some rap. pretty much anything actually
aldude717: wimpy rock
x7: mhm
aldude717: like soft/pop rock?
x7: yeah
x7: lol
aldude717: like HIM?
x7: some.
aldude717: sweet
x7: :-)
aldude717: i think you've seen my room
aldude717: with the heartagram in it...
x7: yeahh
aldude717: best symbol in the world with the best band...HIM
x7: lol nicee
aldude717: i like techno stuff like
aldude717: The Medic Droid, Metro Station, Nice Guys Finish First
aldude717: aslo
aldude717: also*
x7: i like metro station



there was more, but thats the funny part.


another great conversation; at 10:47pm

ment: haha wtf? r u on drugssssssssssssssss?lol
x7: :-Pno
x7: haha, jk
ment: lol
ment: jk u are?
ment: lol
x7: jk i'm not.
x7: lol
ment: thats what you said!
ment: lol
x7: =-O
x7: :-X:'(
x7: hahahah
ment: its ok lol
x7: no, i'm not on drugs

edit //
well i did it, and he understood completely; but he told me that he thinks he loves me :(, i was worried that was happening and i'm just not ready for all that ya know? i hate that i let my ex ruin me, i hate that i can't let anyone get close to me, it's been almost nine months since we officially broke up, and three days since we last spoke, and i haven't let anyone in, of course, i've had boyfriends, but they last like a week or two, i can't keep anyone cause i don't want to let them get close to me, cause i don't want to get hurt, yet again! how do i get over him!?

------------------------------------------------------------


well today is friday, finally.
i worked 11:30-4:30 today :(,
which sucked! and then i spent some
time with matthew. but anyways,
i dont really have any plans this weekend,
besides working.

wellllllllll, a little about me?
 chasity. sixteen. august 28th. senior @ hickory high. christian. kfc. license. jeep grand cherokee. beautiful. shy. smart. blonde. cellphone. LGenV. boyfriend [mbh]*. perverted. young. moody. dr pepper. summer. bff [jtg]. family. duke and app state. energetic. adhd. anemic. smartass. rock & rap. originality. hamster. dog. farm. [rip]honda. confident. self-conscious. naive. computer. rude. crazy. independent. spoiled. laid-back. straight-forward. no drugs. changing. love. respect. music. movies. school supplies. bad luck. allergic to chocolate. animals. glasses. mom, dad, sissy, juicy, step-dad. fortunate. family. jeans. belts. life. happy. pens, pencils, markers. html. webdesign. graphics. website owner. facebook. myspace. aim, yahoo, limewire, photofiltre [softwares of choice]. youngest. carefree. worryless. messy. organized. futon.


anyways; 
i got in a huge ass fight with my ex this morning, he's such a waste of 11 months of my life. we were best friends, then we dated; for 11 months. we broke up and i stayed close friends, well that was a huge mistake. he was always playing all the girls he dated, and kept telling me that i was who he wanted, and that we'd be together, and blah blah blah. well my dumbass believed him. i have this personality that i can't be mean, like at all; and i knew what he was doing to me this whole time, but i was too afraid that i'd piss him off, or that i'd hurt him by saying anything, or just leaving him alone, when now i wish i would have done just that! well this morning he tells me that i was such a waste, and pretty much that i'm a whore. and i was like fuck you steven, and he was like no you aren't good enough to have it, maybe your boyfriend now will let you; and mom says i should've told him "yeah and he'll love it" but i didn't, if i wanted his stupid shit, i would've taken it when he tried. i can't believe i wasted all that time on him!!! 

but on to an amazing subject;
my boyfriend Matthew, has been the best friend through all this shit, that i could ever ask for. he was there to help me when i'd been hurt, and he tried to be nothing more than a friend and he respected my dumbass decisions. i always knew there was a connection with us, and i'm glad that i can finally call him mine, he's truly something between a dream and a miracle. amazed<3